


Kyle's Boomin' Birthday

by KPesh123



Series: Kyle's Boomin' Adventures [21]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Police, Bad Writing, Best Friends, Binge Drinking, Birthday, Birthday Party, Childhood Friends, College, Community College, Drinking, Drugs, Excessive Drinking, Friendship, Good Writing, Heavy Drinking, Late Night Writing, Marijuana, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Other, Party, Partying, Photography, Police, Police Brutality, References to Drugs, Smoking, Underage Drinking, Underage Smoking, Writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:00:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26483812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KPesh123/pseuds/KPesh123
Summary: Kyle's birthday is coming up and he has great plans with The Boys.  Unfortunately things don't go as planned leaving them with a toxic mess.
Series: Kyle's Boomin' Adventures [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1867981





	Kyle's Boomin' Birthday

**Author's Note:**

> Please make sure to read my other works in Kyle's Boomin' Adventures.

Kyle’s Boomin Birthday

Kyle’s birthday was just around the corner. He was going to be nineteen. Since his birthday was going to fall on a Monday, he planned for a two day bender the Friday and Saturday before. Kyle was determined to make up for his last birthday the year before which was a bust. Although it was on a Saturday, Kyle was blown off by his supposed friend Jason. Kyle sat in his dorm that night and watched youtube alone. With a set goal of not reliving that memory, Kyle planned for his birthday weekend to be epic. 

Kyle’s plan was simple. On Friday he would log off of his online Spanish class and meet up with the boys. They would go around the county so Kyle could take pictures for his photography class. For his art requirement, Kyle chose photography since it was interesting and easy. Since college was online this semester, Kyle recruited the boys to be his photography team, going with him on photoshoots, helping him take pictures of whatever he needed. On Saturday all the boys would congregate at Kyle’s house to party. This would also see the triumphant return of Chris, who had been M.I.A since the Wank Bang Incident. With these birthday plans set, Kyle could not wait for the weekend to begin. 

Friday morning Kyle got up at around 8:20am. His class being at 10:25am, he got ready for the day. After sitting on his couch bored beyond belief, watching the professor drone on in spanish about god knows what, the class ended and Kyle got up. The boys met Kyle in front of his house in Nick’s car. From there they drove off. After hitting a few parks, getting the shots they needed. Nick drove the car in an unknown direction. 

“Uh Nick?” Gianni asked. “Where the fuck are we going?” 

“You’ll see.” Nick responded. 

“I swear to god if it’s to Buckakoos for another Chiwawa.” Kyle said.

“Hey fuck you! I’m a fat fuck okay?!” Nick responded.

After five minutes of driving on the local highway, the car reached a roundabout in neighboring Middletown. As it turned out, Nick drove the boys to the local Brookdale Community College in order to get some pictures of the seemingly abandoned campus. The boys got out of Nick’s car and walked around campus. Kyle got many pictures of them walking around. In Kyle’s eyes, Brookdale was a beautiful campus, almost as pretty as Kyle’s school if not more. Once Kyle was done taking pictures for the time being, Gianni took the group to “The Spot.” Brookdale was partially a forest just like Kyle’s school. Instead of leaving it to be infested with squirrels however, the community college decided to put in nature trails and places for people to congregate. One part of the nature trail had a wood seating area where the stoners of the school would come to smoke. Once the boys reached “The Spot,” Gianni took out a joint and lit it. The boys passed the joint around, even Kyle took hits from it.

In the few weeks prior, Kyle had finally tried weed for the first time. It was a momentous occasion everyone was waiting for both at Kyle’s school as well as in his friend group. The boy’s friend Colin was having a pool party and everyone was invited. Malcolm and Kyle were the first ones to show at 11:30 in the morning. Immediately upon arrival Colin gave them cans of Fosters beer, which were the size of oil cans. They set up the beer pong table and started drinking. More people showed and everyone was having a good time either playing beer pong or swimming in the pool. At one point during the event, Colin got out a joint to smoke, others followed. Having a few beers and a Mike’s Hard Strawberry Lemonade in his system, Kyle was finally willing to try it. Kyle went back with the group and took a few hits off of the joint. After going back into the pool and drinking more beer, Kyle still felt nothing from the joint. Colin then brought out his dab rig. Kyle took one hit from that and wouldn’t stop coughing like a motherfucker. From the moment he hit Colin’s dab to the point of Malcolm throwing up, Kyle did not remember a single thing. According to Nick, Kyle had the eyes of a Chinese man and was incredibly fucked beyond belief. After Malcolm threw up everywhere in Colin’s yard, Kyle was brought back home where he was confronted by his parents. Just by one look at him his parents knew how gone Kyle was, not being able to speak and passing out on his couch upstairs. 

There was a second time in which Kyle tried weed. It was the first week of online school for him. It was a Friday night and some of the guys were at Malcolm’s place. Malcolm’s dad was gone for the night, the first time since quarantine started back in March. The night was normal at first. Kyle drank around ten Budwisers and smoked everyone’s Black and Milds and one cigarette. Eventually Malcolm and his fuck buddy Leah went into her car to smoke. Kyle decided to join them. Since Kyle wasn’t as fucked up, he could actually remember what it would be like this time. Kyle was given a bong and took three hits out of it, finally feeling something from weed. Kyle’s arms felt bendy and when he got out of the car, he felt even more fucked up than he was earlier. Nick and Gianni had fell asleep, Malcolm and Leah went out to a parking lot in order to fuck. Being the only one awake, Kyle grabbed another beer and downed it. Sitting on the living room couch, Kyle decided to go to sleep. The next morning Kyle woke up hungover. After taking a massive shit from the beer, he got up and gathered his things. While everyone was packing up their things, Kyle couldn’t help but smell the stench of throwup. Kyle was confused however since he did not throw up the entirety of the night. Kyle looked down on the couch and found a massive stain on the cushion, which seemed to drip onto the side and eventually hit his bag and bandana. Kyle had thrown up in his sleep and miraculously survived without choking on his own puke. Kyle and the boys were baffled beyond belief at first but cleaned up the mess, getting away with the party. 

After smoking at “The Spot,” the boys decided to explore campus a little more. 

As Kyle was taking pictures for his class, the boys enjoyed the sunny weather and the empty campus high. No one was there, not even the Brookdale police. Nick decided to show the boys where he used to do his radio show before the pandemic hit. The boys approached the building which had automated doors. There was a sign on the door saying the building was closed, however the doors opened anyway. 

“What the fuck? It says it’s closed though.” Kyle commented.

“I guess we go in.” Gianni commented.

“Bet, I’m down to explore one of these buildings.” Mark said. 

The boys walked into the poorly lit academic hall. The building housed the nursing and radio departments. It looked as if the school was setting up for some classes to be in person, with arrows on the floors and one way signs on the walls. The boys proceeded to walk down a dark empty hall. The setting was erie with most of the classroom lights off and the hallways poorly lit. For a while the boys were the only ones in the building. While on a bridge going in between buildings however, the boys heard footsteps from down the hall. 

“Oh fuck it’s the cops!” Malcolm shouted. 

As it turned out a silent alarm went off when the boys walked into the building alerting the campus police of the intruders. Since Brookdale was only a community college, the campus police department was not very strong. The Brookdale police department consisted of the people who failed the police academy. Not knowing proper procedures on how to deal with trespassers, the campus police started shooting at the boys without warning, failing to hit any of them. Not having their guns on them, the boys ran out through the library into the open campus. The boys reached Nick’s car and started to drive off. As this was happening, the campus police got in their cars and tried to start the engines. Since they forgot to fill the cars with gas, they wouldn’t start rendering them useless. With no cops chasing the boys, they got away easily. 

The boys then went to Asbury Park in order to get more pictures for Kyle’s class. After walking in the Grand Arcade, the boys took their masks off in order to breathe, instead of Nick who was too lazy to take his off. Since his mask had a cool pattern a seemingly nice older lady approached him.

“Excuse me, may I please take a picture of your mask for my blog?” The woman asked.

“Uh sure.” Nick responded confused. 

The woman took a few pictures of Nick while the boys looked at each other in concern and confusion. The woman then turned to the boys and noticed that Kyle had a camera as well, one that was out of the ballpark compared to hers. The woman turned to Kyle. 

“I see you have a camera as well.” The woman said. 

“Yea I’m doing it for my photography class.” Kyle responded.

“What school do you go to?” 

“Geed University.”

“I’ve never heard of that? Where is that?”

“Yea it’s pretty shit and unknown. It’s in North Jersey.” 

“I bet they teach you about film and all that.”

“No, just how to use a camera.” 

“Back when I was your age they taught us real photography before this digital stuff. Let me tell you something, you’re a new photographer, find something you’re passionate about and build off that. For me that’s erotic photography.” 

The boys froze looking at each other. Nick checked out of the conversation immediately while Kyle and Malcolm entertained the woman, covering their faces trying so hard not to laugh.

“I take nude photos of trans-sexuals. I used to photograph the live sex shows in Times Square in the 80’s.” The woman explained.

“Wait what?” Malcolm asked.

“Yes back in the day before the internet people would go to theatres and watch people have sex on stage. Sometimes couples went and did their thing after while some people went alone. It was great until Guliani came and got rid of that.” The woman explained at the top of her lungs in the middle of the boardwalk.

“Why the fuck would anyone go to that?” Nick asked blatantly. 

“What’s wrong with that?” The woman asked. 

“I don’t get why people would go and watch others fuck in front of them.” Nick responded.

“Well you sometimes have to go out of your comfort zone in order to capture art.” The woman responded. 

The woman told the boys to look her up and gave them her blog name and walked off. The boys looked at each other for a minute then laughed hysterically. For ten minutes straight they would not stop talking and laughing about the character they had just ran into on the boardwalk. During this Nick went to a snack stand in order to eat his pain away. 

“The weird ones always gravitate to me!” Nick shouted to the boys at the top of his lungs.

After getting a few more photos the boys went to Sandy Hook and watched the sunset. The next day, Kyle got up and went to Seven Eleven in order to get ice for his cooler. One at a time the boys came except for Nick, who was getting last minute things. Hanging out back in Kyle’s sunroom and deck, the party was in full swing. Everything was going well until they heard a knock on the front door. Mark and Malcolm walked to the door thinking it was Nick with the present they had told him to get. Instead the Brookdale Police from the day earlier was on Kyle’s lawn without a warrant. Mark called up Nick. 

“Nick what the fuck?! Where are you with the Chiwawa?!” Mark asked.

“I couldn’t do it. You were right not to trust me.” Nick replied out of breath while burping.

Their plan was simple. Nick was supposed to go and order a Chiwawa from Buckakoos, the local burrito place. Instead of a small dog which the Chinese scarf every night, it is a name for a rice ball covered with various Mexican food assortments such as beans and shredded cheese. Nick was supposed to put birthday candles in the Chiwawa as though it was a birthday cake. Unfortunately since Nick was a fat ass, he ate the entire thing in the parking lot and was on the verge of a food coma in front of his car. Their mission had failed. 

“What the fuck do we do?!” Malcolm asked frantically.

“I know how to handle this.” Kyle said, grabbing his gun.

Kyle loaded his gun and put it down his pants. He proceeded to walk out his front door and approach the Brookdale Police, who were ready to shoot him on site. After a minute of standoff Kyle started speaking.

“The fuck you doing at my party?” Kyle asked. “You’re not invited.”

“You and your crew are under arrest.” The cop said.

“Where’s your warrant?” 

“The fuck is a warrant?” 

“Retard, you need a warrant to come onto my property. How the fuck are you a cop?” 

“I shoot black people and take away rights.” 

“Exactly, you’re a pussy. If you don’t get off my property I will legally shoot you.” 

Not knowing any protocol the cop took out his gun and started firing at Kyle, missing every shot. After the cop cleared his gun Kyle shot one hit into the cops leg intentionally in order to slow him down. Another Brookdale cop arrived as backup. He got out of his car and started shooting. Kyle shot back until he ran out of bullets. With no bullets left Kyle ran for the front door. At that moment Nick drove up and smashed his car into the cop. After torching the car and dropping the cops in the woods, the boys partied the rest of the night in honor of Kyle’s birthday. 

I hope you enjoyed my Boomin’ Birthday, it’s my fucking birthday. 

  
  



End file.
